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hardly had much sleep. started the day with a fine incurred for returning a book late (but there was a bloody jam!).
reviewing my biopsych test that's about to start in 75 minutes time.
bloody history paper to write right after my test. 5 hours to do it. sketchy outline done up with nothing but my name on that paper. i know, that's as big as my ego gets.
"Bohemia, Bohemia
Is a fallacy in your head
This is Calcutta
Bohemia is dead"
- La vie Boheme, Rent.
elroy.
fml.
so, i received a call from a friend i've not met for a good 6 years now. was never the best of friends but we were never enemies too.
thought to myself, "how bad could it be?"
agreed to "catch up" only to find out he/she would be out to sell.
seriously now?
oh well, at least he/she kinda made her intentions clear -and i made mine too.
- Music:Alicia Keys - Un-Thinkable (i'm ready)
by doing so, he often finds himself in deep shit situations.
about a year ago, he made some really stupid decisions and has been haunted by the after effects ever since (evident from the growing waistline).
with the new year kicking in in full swing at his face, he has been trying to catch a breather. he aims to ace his exams this semester despite all the AIESEC commitments and also to continue with his Spanish lessons and to find time to resume his work with the Children's Cancer Foundation. the latter which is something he regrets having to give up a year ago.
elroy would also like to take this opportunity to say "la vida es mierda! "
garh. so much shit to sort before i go on monday.
"i'm braindead virtually".
elroy
- Music:Blur - Coffee and TV
this life and where the hell's my Navidad?
- Music:La Roux - In For The Kill (Skream's Let's Get Ravey Remix)
Anyway, WhoopieeDoo!
Finally done with my exams.
3 weeks of camping over and befriending guards at Law School, phew.
So gonna fail one of my papers for real. But, oh well.
I kinda missed those days where i walk into exams halls with a little smug. Now, all i do is to prep myself with confidence to bull through my papers!
anyway, a little spoof on Videophone:
garh!
off to piece my life-post exam-back together.
elroy
Crap! it's 1530 already?!
- Music:Alicia Keys - Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart
i hate telegraph.co.uk for introducing this!
Face Slide
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Jill Scott's Gettin' In The Way.
hardly a new song but still one of my favourites, reeking of oomph and attitude!
"sugar honey girl fly fly away
I been a lady up to now don't know how much more I can take
Queens shouldn't swing if you know what I mean
But I'm bout to take my earrings off get me some Vaseline
(You better go on get out my face girl you better chill)
Chill and I mean it
(You better back down before you get smacked down you better chill)
You better relax yourself
(You better go on get out my face girl you better chill
He's my man and nobody else's\"
Yo mama!
Woohoo!
almost done for my psych report on human communications!
done with the part i've been yanking my hair out for, that is.
Now, if only i could speed up on the edits and presentation.
Garh! anyway, my nightmare for the night is almost over!
last week of school and i've got an evolutionary psych presentation and two more spanish tests to go, on top of that human communications thing.... And i thought the last week of school's where people start skipping school to prepare for exams.
Gawd, i'm talking so much shit. Anyway, Jill Scott kicks ass and Stats can kiss my ass!
elroy
- Music:Jill Scott - Gettin' In The Way
My predictable Wednesday.
day starts off with plans to wake up at 0900 to leave school in time for cognitive psychology at 1030. 0845, Alarms start having a go at me from marimbas to motorcycles on the iphone. Fingers fumbles to switch them off as i stuff the phone under my pillow. Eyes shut, body limp while my mind goes into a hyperdrive-thinking, thinking, thinking.
i think about how fucked i am.
i think about how good everything is.
i think about the people i wish would just drop dead and die.
i think about the people i care and if i've the time for them.
i think about what i should be doing today.
i think about all the stuff i've to do.
i think about the things i do not have the answers to.
i think about sleep.
and i fall right back into sleep.
i wake a few hours later. sometimes with text, sometimes without. Sometimes it goes, "hey, coming for lecture?" to which i sheepishly reply, "Ooopsy, i just woke up. was it any good?"
Generalmente me levanto, me ducho, me afeito, me peino y me visto. A veces desayuno pero siempre abuela un beso antes de salir de casa. Conduzco para la universidad. Mi clase comienza...
Searching for a lot, cursing and swearing till i find one. Walk the long paths of NTU, find the way for my lecture theatre despite the deceiving signs that has got me missing/late for numerous tests now. Usually, i'll get into the class about 10-15 minutes late. Slipping behind the lecturer, seated at the same side, talk about evolution.
And always, (though the strength of it differs on days), i get nauseous. Terribly nauseous. I would love to throw up but i usually skip breakfast-so nope, i don't think that's an option. I nose which usually is stuffed always pick up this particular scent. THE SCENT that makes me nauseous. I look up and it's always that FB (think Austin Powers) with that stuck up look. GAWD. the source of my Wednesday routine.
For crying out loud, it's bad enough you're running around in public, releasing your body odour, you really didn't have to ambush a group of students in a terribly small lecture theatre. I don't think a decent deodorant would cost much. Love yourself a little, more. There i would, stuffing mints and emptying whatever sweets (again usually mints) to mask out the smell. It's so not fair i run the risk of running to the loo with their laxative effect threatening. It really ain't.
Anyway, to break the horrors of FB and BOs, i'm gonna catch Charlie Unicorn!
Another case of "it's so annoying it's good!"
elroy
still in school. still flippin' books. still being tested.
Anyway,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7IGE58IP
"Love, love is like a stubborn youth
That you'd rather just deny
I'm walking on a broken roof
While I'm looking at the sky
It's all false love and affection
You don't want me
You just like the attention
Yes it's all false love and affection
You don't like me
You just want the attention
I'm not your toy
This isn't another girl meets boy
I'm not your toy
This isn't another girl meets boy"
- Music:La Roux - I'm not your toy
i said, "no", (unforgivingly-oh the irony!) mumbled a few lines and came to realisation, that, oh, we are actually. -i'll leave this as such since the issue is a little raw and sensitive as of now.
driving home from a lovely night at East Coast for Carl's with Bernice and walking Jackie after an awful day of people botching up marketing campaigns which got me scrambling to wipe up people's asses-that also effectively screwed my plans and my very first day of recess week. bummer. Random people popped up. Oh! Chatted with dear Miss C from half way round the globe too, like finally, (not quite but close to) a proper conversation.
anyway, on being unforgiving, i do find it hard to forgive when the person on the other end just seem so detached from it. IT, being the shit and mess they've created yet not have the decency to take up the responsibility or slightest hint of remorse for it.
which begs the question, why bother apologising when you don't even mean it? i'm not an idiot and that's not my name(sorry, The Ting Tings played in my mind for a while there)!
of course, that's not to say that i don't ever forgive. I do, when it is sincere. Numbers mean nothing to me.
I also do when the person on the other end may be a little too daft to understand the severity of their own action-but when i've laid my cards on the table, that seriously, to me, WAS the golden opportunity to apologise. Just a simple, heartfelt sorry that probably lasts 0.3 seconds and TaDaah! You've got the issue settled.
Oh well, i see you chose the different route though, and that to me WAS and IS my indication to sieve my circle of friends. Funny how a few weeks before, i was at a networking event and came in conversation with someone about spotting bullshit. She has issues spotting bullshit. I don't, if i find them, they're out of my life.
if i was a friend of benefits of sorts, rather, a sucker for sympathetic situations to be used, that, is actually fine, in the name of existentialism, that's really why we are around anyway. However, being a sucker for sympathetic situations to be abused, now, that just took it up one notch too much for my sensibilities to accept. Like, you know, like, Me, like, stuuupiiid, like it happened? i guess it's ¡Adios! friendship, ¡Hola¡ ...what do you call it these days anyway? You know, those you call (quoting Brenda) "fake as pressed on nails"?
anyway, elroy, focus!
europe with siblings! beach bumming for executive board retreat! all in december! need to churn out money-if only Leprechaun were real! ... would totally bitch slap for gold now.
- Music:Rufus Wainwright - Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk
people.
insolent.
imbecile.
pisses me.
off, big time.
what the fuck?
- Bitch Alert:
pissed
should have just majored in one of those arty farty subjects instead.
i wouldn't be yanking my hair out now.
annoyed.
just one biting the bullet.
just one bit the dust.
thrown into the game,
crowned "the f pawn" for the year,
drowned and isolate.
puppet on a string,
left dangle dangled dangling,
lying limbs on a string.
treated me a fool,
that i never thought i would,
churned spurned burned for good.
chances floated free,
how about some penitence,
classic/old school ones?
"Why'd you sing Hallelujah, if it means nothing to you" - (Thank you) Damien Rice,
though you may have meant it a little more "Delicate" manner, but that line alone is befitting here, bastardised or not.
never expected myself to be the fool but i was.
(oh my god. i was so stupid!)
don't ever expect me to be there, ever.
Hallelujah, time really does tell. I'm glad i saw for myself.
Hallelujah, i'm through with you. I don't deserve this and a friend like that.
elroy
- Bitch Alert:
relieved - Music:matt alber - end of the world
out of the jungle and into the mountains i go!
2 ICTs down, 8 more to go.
never quite imagine myself to say this, but reservist was actually pretty fun. And yeah, it was a good break from aiesec work since i couldn't access my emails at all. (but i'm clearing all the shit from 2 weeks in my mailbox now. Phew! down to 71 from 180!)
handled a bunch of drunk girls puking all over the airport -which was seriously quite hilarious. the only regret being that i didn't take down any of those evidence. Damn! lost 5 potential money trees.
Still, more aiesec work to go as i get back into groove.
Off to Melbourne tonight, snowboarding tomorrow!
elroy
54 emails awaiting responses!
discuss, discuss, discuss.
plan and plan some more.
31 emails left!
bitch and gag.
discuss, respond to emails, discuss.
22 more emails to go!
1 individual plan
1 overdue department budget
1 website to check
2 blogs to update
2 corporate meetings
3 order enquiries
3 branding/communications package/workshops to roll out.
4 proposals to work on
weee!
15 emails to go.
gee, i think i'm getting better at multi-tasking.
elroy.
damn it! more emails are coming in. ARRRGH!!!
- Location:law school
- Music:annie lennox - why
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=1
dear friends, fans (being deluded, may i add), random blog visitors and stalkers (again! i'm being deluded!)
anyway, if you are interested, do get back to me.
your support would be very much appreciated now and for the future generations to come.
elroy
i just spent over 2 hours following tweeters and live blog updates from wayangparty.com !
not that i regret it; it's exciting stuff but with 3 more papers to go... damn!
fingers crossed on the aware saga.
now, i really should take her advise to "shut up and sit down".
elroy
back to books, hopefully.
elroy
